Self-soothing is simply the act of comforting yourself, much like you would comfort a friend or a child.

It’s about consciously engaging your senses and your mind to shift away from stress and towards a sense of peace and safety.

The best part? You already have everything you need to start.

Here are some simple, yet effective, ways to self-soothe when stress starts to creep in:

1. Engage our senses (The 5-4-3-2-1 Method)

This grounding technique is fantastic for pulling you out of a spiral of anxious thoughts and back into the present moment.

• 5 things you can see: Look around you. Notice details – the colour of a wall, the texture of a fabric, the way light hits an object.

• 4 things you can feel: Notice sensations – the chair beneath you, your clothes on your skin, the temperature of the air, the gentle pressure of your feet on the floor.

• 3 things you can hear: Listen closely – distant traffic, birdsong, the hum of an appliance, your own breathing.

• 2 things you can smell: Take a deep breath – coffee, a candle, fresh air, your perfume.

• 1 thing you can taste: If possible, pop a mint, sip some water, or simply notice the taste in your mouth.

2. Connect with nature (even indoors!)

Nature has an incredible power to calm our thoughts.

• Step outside: Even a few minutes in your garden, a local park, or just sitting on your porch can make a difference. Notice the sky, the trees, the sounds of nature.

• Bring nature in: If stepping out isn’t an option, look at photos of natural landscapes, listen to nature sounds (rain, ocean waves), or tend to a houseplant.

3. Embrace gentle movement

Physical activity can release tension and shift your mood.

• Gentle stretching: Slowly stretch your neck, shoulders, and back. Feel the release in your muscles.

• Walk mindfully: Take a short walk, focusing on the rhythm of your steps and your breath.

• Yoga or Tai Chi: Even short, guided sequences can be incredibly soothing.

4. Leverage the power of scent

Our sense of smell is directly linked to the emotional centre of our brain (limbic system).

• Essential Oils: Diffuse calming essential oils like lavender, chamomile, or bergamot with bring a sense of tranquility.

• Comforting Scents: Light a favourite scented candle, brew a calming cup of herbal tea, or simply inhale the scent of a beloved blanket.

5. Create a soothing soundscape

Sound can profoundly impact our nervous system.

• Calming music: Put on relaxation, instrumental, classical, or gentle ambient sounds.

• Nature sounds: Listen to recordings of rain, ocean waves, or forest sounds.

• White noise: Sometimes, simply blocking out jarring sounds with white noise can be soothing. White noise can be generated by a variety of items, both natural and artificial.

• Examples include static from a radio or television, the sound of a fan, a whirring air conditioner, a hairdryer, running water, or even the sound of rain.

6. Create a soothing soundscape

This isn’t about emotional eating, but about mindful enjoyment.

• Warm Drinks: Sip a warm cup of herbal tea (chamomile, peppermint), hot water with lemon, or decaf coffee.

• Small Treats: If you choose a treat, do so mindfully. Notice the texture, flavour, and how it feels to savour it slowly.

7. Self-compassion and Affirmation

Sometimes the most powerful soothing comes from within.

• Positive Self-Talk: Offer yourself kind words. “It’s okay to feel this way,” “I am safe,” “This feeling will pass.”

• Deep Breathing: Focus on slow, deep breaths. Inhale deeply, hold for a few counts, exhale slowly. This signals to your nervous system that you are safe.

• Journaling: Write down your feelings without judgment. Getting thoughts out of your head can be incredibly relieving.

The Key is Experimentation

What soothes one person might not work for another. The beautiful thing about self-soothing is that it’s deeply personal. 

Take the time to experiment with these techniques and discover what truly brings you comfort and calm.

Build a “self-soothe toolkit” – a mental or even physical list of things you can turn to when you need to find your inner rhythm again.

Remember, self-soothing isn’t about ignoring your problems, but about regulating your emotions so you can approach challenges with a clearer, calmer mind.

Start small, be kind to yourself, and rediscover your innate ability to find your calm.